caramelbox | don't be in doubt and stray

[Miriam finds Jay at the foot of the stairs, clinging to the rail with in order to keep his balance. His ankle is still bothering him, He looks at her, expression cold and unreadable.]

... [At least it's just the girl, not the otters. Her name is... Miriam. She's been in and out of the room the otters have kept him in, bringing him food and asking him questions that he can't answer. (It's strange. What is a girl doing living with a bunch of otters in an underground village?) He stares at her, warily, from underneath a fringe of dark hair. Without anything to tie it back with, it's getting in the way even more than usual.

What does she want? Is she going to wake the otters up and make him go back to sleep? He's tired of sleeping, of wasting time lying about when he should be picking up Master's trail.]

[ Careful to not slip, she slowly takes a few steps down the stairs—enough that they're somewhat closer, but there's still a decent distance between them.

Tugging on one of her sleeves, she looks at her feet to keep eyes off him. The less chance of eye contact—even in the dark—the better. ]

Y-you should be resting... s-so you can heal. [ Whether or not he got better... didn't matter that much to her personally.

...But the Oresoren surely want him to heal, to be healthy and happy... just like they want her to be. So, for their sakes, she'll care too. ]

[Jay shakes his head, dark hair flying in front of his eyes. No. He can't stay here. It doesn't matter if his injuries weren't healed yet; it will take weeks, months before he's completely healed. By then, it will be far too late to catch up with Master.

It's fine. Although these injuries are worse than what he's used to working with, he can manage. ... probably.]

[ ...Was he ever going to say anything? Was it that he couldn't, or that he was too good to talk them? Even just a yes or no would be nice. It was... annoying.

But she couldn't get angry at him for that. She was the same once as well. ]

I-It's important to t-them that you recover... S-so you have to... [ Her small hands ball into tiny fist while her lip quivers. He had to get better, or the Oresoren would be sad.

That wasn't something she was going to let happen if she could help it. ]

[Get ready for a really annoying next few months, Miriam, because you are not hearing a word from him for a long time.

It doesn't really matter what the otters or this girl think is best. They don't understand the situation... and he's not allowed to explain it to them. Instead, Jay turns away from the stairs and limps towards the main area; without the rail to support him, he has to walk very carefully, favoring his injured ankle, to keep his balance.]

[ She'll get use to it eventually, or at least tolerate it. ]

H-hey—! W-wait, you shouldn't—! [ Instinctively, she reaches out to grab him—which isn't possible, of course, considering the distance and height between them. So, naturally, she fumbles and falls down the remaining steps. It's far from quiet tumble, but at least she doesn't scream or break anything. ]

[Normally, it would have been as easy as breathing to slip away from Miriam's outstretched hand. But his ankle is sprained, there's a long gash across his chest, and his ribs feel like one big bruise. All of it impedes his mobility and reflexes, leaving him unable to react quickly to her fall.

Although he tries to move out of the way, he just isn't fast enough. Miriam lands on top of him and he falls again, his bad ankle twisting and folding underneath him. The two of them land with a loud thump on the carpeted floor. Tears of pain swim in front of his eyes, but Jay refuses to allow himself to make a sound.

Crying is a sign of weakness. He's already a failure--he can't stand the thought of being weak. With shaky hands, Jay reaches out to try and push Miriam off of him... but there's no strength in the gesture. He might have been in bed for a week, but just walking down the winding staircase of the otters' home has taken a great deal of energy out of him.]

[ Luckily for Jay, even with no strength to actually push Miriam off, she doesn't waste time to scoot away from him. Although she scuttles too far back and hits her head on the railing of the stairs. While she wasn't crying before, the thump to the head is certainly does it.

She just wanted to help. But she failed—just like always. She really was useless. Useless useless useless uselessuselessuselessuseless.

Tightly pulling her legs to her chest, she silent cries to herself—well, tries to. There's a few sobs and hiccups that escape. ]

[Jay doesn't acknowledge the sound of crying; it doesn't to matter to him why she's started, only that her soft cries will eventually wake up the otters. He doesn't even look at her. Whatever narrow margin of time he had to escape is rapidly disappearing; if he wants to leave, he needs to act quickly.

But his limbs won't properly obey him. He tries pushing himself up, palms flat against the floor, again and again, until the last of his feeble strength fades. Then he lies on the floor, shoulders trembling, and swallows down a thick knot of pain and despair.

He's... so weak. A pathetic failure, who couldn't carry out his mission. He couldn't even properly die, which is how he got into this position in the first place. Why... did he even bother trying to escape? Even if he did, there's no way Master would want something as useless as him back.]

don't be in doubt and stray

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